Rituals matter.
When you think about your life and some of the biggest moments in it, chances are good there were some ritual involved.
Rituals are time honored traditions, ceremonies or other actions performed that create intentional space for people to come together and be present with one another. Whether celebrating at a wedding or grieving at a funeral, these sacred containers of time and space allow us to suspend ordinary reality for a few hours or days and be present with ourselves, with our community, and with God.
Rituals can also be the simple things that we do every day that gives our lives meaning and invite us to take time to slow down and pause. Perhaps you savor your morning cup of tea in your grandmother’s china teacup. Or call a long distance loved one at the same time every week. Maybe you say the exact same prayer with your children before you tuck them into bed each night.
Ever since my mom died last year, I’ve been thinking a lot about the importance of rituals in our lives. The white rose ceremony that I held for my mother here in Houston and then at her funeral in Clearwater, Florida helped me, and others who loved her, to let her go with love and respect, honor, and dignity.
As we approach another holiday season without her, I think about her a lot and the rituals she created in our little family of three when I was growing up.
In the summertime at the peak of berry season, it would be a grand treat to have strawberry shortcake on Sundays for lunch. Not dessert. But lunch. She would make these huge flaky cat head size biscuits and she would soak the strawberries and sugar overnight. She made homemade whipped cream and slathered the biscuits with fresh creamed butter. This was a summer ritual for our family. YUM!
For our birthdays, whoever’s birthday we were celebrating got to choose their favorite meal and Mom would make it. Mine was always lamb chops. Thick juicy lamb chops that we would buy from the butcher at Brunetti’s market in downtown Ridgefield, Connecticut where I grew up.
Every Friday, we would get pizza from Venice Pizzeria and then we would go to Baskin Robbins and get jamoca almond fudge for my mom and mint chocolate chip for me and my dad.
And of course, there were always holiday rituals. We had to have pumpkin pie at Thanksgiving, open one present on Christmas Eve after going to church and my parents threw their festive champagne infused New Year’s Eve party every year when I was little.
When I think back on the happy memories of growing up, it’s these rituals that I remember the most.
Now that I have my own little family, also a family of three, we are establishing our own rituals. Both my husband and I are very mindful of teaching our daughter the importance of expressing gratitude. We believe it’s important to live your life from a place of thankfulness and to count your blessings every single day. We’ve had several loved ones die in the past year and have a few other beloveds who are battling difficult diseases right now. Every minute we have on this Earth is precious and cultivating a regular practice of gratitude is good for the mind, body, and spirit.
Here are three Gratitude Rituals for Thanksgiving Time for you to consider incorporating into your family and/or business practices.
November is a great time to start because there is an attitude of gratitude that is pervasive in our communities, but of course, these rituals would be appropriate at any time of year.
1. Start a gratitude bowl. At work or at home (or both!), start a practice of recording your gratitudes on slips of paper and then putting it in a special bowl dedicated to this purpose. Then once a week or once a month, have a team or family meeting to sit down and one by one, review the gratitudes and savor them again. It’s a conscious way to connect with your colleagues and loved ones and it’s a terrific exercise to foster good will in the work place and to teach children the value of sharing our gratitudes on a daily basis.
2. Express your gratitude directly. People like to be appreciated for a job well done, a goal achieved, a risk taken, or simply for being kind. Some easy ways to do this:
- Give someone a shout out on social media (Facebook and Twitter are great for this!) or a recommendation on LinkedIn, Amazon or Yelp (depending on their business).
- Send a personalized card (and maybe a gift, too) using Send Out Cards. This system is a great way to really send a heartfelt thank you. (Want to learn more? Send me an email! It’s one of my favorite systems in my business!)
- Pick up the phone and CALL someone. (Not a text, not an email!) It’s guaranteed to brighten their day.
3. Keep a gratitude journal. This is a practice that was popularized by Oprah years ago so you’ve probably heard of it. But have you ever kept one? It’s an excellent discipline to help you shift your focus from what’s missing in your life to instead shine the spotlight on the abundance you already have in your life! Once I started keeping a gratitude journal, it helped me to be more open and receptive to the abundance of good flowing my way. Simply dedicate a journal to your gratitude practice and write down 3-5 things each day that you’re grateful for.
Giving voice to your blessings sends a message to the universe that you are grateful to receive which tends to prime the pump for more abundance and goodness to flow your way! If you already have a gratitude ritual that you do, I’d love to hear about it – send me a note! Or if you decide to try one of these, let me know how it goes.
As always, I’m GRATEFUL you are here in my community,
Elizabeth
P.S. I’ve decided to resume publishing my e-zine once a month so we can stay connected. If you want more regular contact, please come say hello on Facebook!
P.P.S. If you’re in the Houston area, I want to be sure you know about my upcoming one day retreats! New Year, New You! Business Planning Retreat for 2018 – December 7, 2017 from 9-3 and the
Vision Board Retreat 2018 – January 12, 2018 from 9-1