During one of her long stints in the hospital when she was dying, my mom randomly said to me, “You know, I didn’t grow up with books.”
Huh?
This was the woman who taught me to read by age three. She read voraciously, did crossword puzzles daily, and beat me mercilessly at Scrabble for years until she taught me how to play well enough that I started outscoring her, maybe half of the time.
But she grew up in an orphanage and that day, in the hospital, explained to me that her love of reading came precisely because she was deprived of books. The only books she had as a child were ones she needed for school. But as soon as she graduated and moved out of the orphanage, one of her most prized possessions was her library card.
Reading opens worlds.
It opened her world.
And she made sure it opened mine.
I read a lot of fiction in my twenties but when I became an entrepreneur at age 30, I started devouring books on business, personal development, and spiritual growth. The categories on my bookshelf (that I’m staring at right now) are:
- Inspirational
- Adoption
- Spirituality
- Shamanism
- Grief + Loss
- Human Design
- Speaking + Writing
- Business Growth + Coaching
- Myers-Briggs
- Feng Shui
- Astrology
- Finance
- Health
- Parenting
So, I’ll share with you some of my favorites and would love to hear from you if you’ve read any of these or what are some of the most influential books that you have read. I’m always looking for recommendations!
24 Books that Have Influenced Me (in no particular order)
1. Sabbath: Finding Rest, Renewal and Delight in our Busy Lives by Wayne Muller – This book is underlined and dog-eared more than any book in my collection. In the opening pages, he reminds us that even Nature requires rest. If certain plants don’t lie dormant in winter, they won’t produce fruit in the spring. Neither will you. ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐
2. The Four Agreements by Don Miguel Ruiz – The Four Agreements are straightforward: Be impeccable with your word. Don’t take anything personally. Don’t make assumptions. Always do your best. Simple, powerful and truly transformational concepts. What I love best about these? They apply in all situations in life—relationships, business, health, spirituality, self-care—you name it, it fits.
3. Big Magic by Liz Gilbert – I love her storytelling and especially the chapters on courage, enchantment, permission, persistence, trust, and divinity. When I get a bit of writer’s block, I’ll open to a page and see her directives “You do not need anyone’s permission to live a creative life!” or “Always remember that people’s judgments of you are none of your business” and I suddenly feel freer to share my voice.
4. It Didn’t Start with You by Mark Wolyn. I’ve been interested in family constellations work for years. Research in neuroscience and stress is showing us that sometimes the health challenges we face may be linked back to inherited family trauma. The author reminds us that with stress comes resiliency so delving into the difficult stuff in your family’s past doesn’t have to be depressing. When you learn the facts, you can use that information to realize just how strong your ancestors were—and be grateful they passed those traits forward to you! ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐
5. The War of Art and Turning Pro by Steven Pressfield. Blocked creatively? Pick up one of these gems, read a page or two, and you’ll be unstuck in no time! They are small books with a BIG impact.
6. Childhood Disrupted by Donna Jackson Nakazawa – The correlation between childhood trauma and lifelong chronic illness is eye opening. If you’ve ever taken the Adverse Childhood Experiences Survey, you’ll know what I mean. I found myself nodding my head and underlining a lot as I not only see myself reflected in the author’s research but also see the stories of dozens of my clients and friends.
7. The Book of Joy by The Dalai Lama and Archbishop Desmond Tutu – This book just makes me HAPPY! Of course, it should, it’s a book about joy! But what I love about it is being privy to the intimate friendship that two of our world’s greatest spiritual leaders, a Christian and a Buddhist monk, as they tackle the immense subject of how to find joy in a world fraught with sorrow. This is a lovely read, and I have given it as a gift to several friends and clients.
8. It’s OK That You’re Not OK by Megan Devine – Straight talk about how to grieve in a culture that doesn’t do grief well, at all.
9. The Artist’s Way by Julia Cameron – I read this book with my book club in Asheville more than 20 years ago. We still gather regularly two decades later. A profound book filled with creative exercises and insights to hush the inner voice (or external messages from childhood) that say “You’re not creative”. We are ALL creative and this book will help you access your gifts! ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐
10. Codependent No More by Melody Beattie – I first read this in college when my counselor suggested it. I was trying to understand the dysfunctional alcoholic household that I grew up in. In addition to therapy, I was attending ACOA and Al-Anon meetings regularly. This book helped me to see the codependent relationship I had with my family and helped me learn how to take care of myself after years of thinking I had to take care of them.
11. How to Laugh in Ironic Amusement During Your Existential Crisis by James McCrae. I picked this up during the pandemic and its inspirational sayings and funny memes kept me upbeat during a challenging time. Messages like “Normalize standing in awe before the mystery of the Universe” and “Don’t worry. Nobody else knows what’s going on either,” were a balm for my soul.
12. The Power of Intention by Wayne Dyer. I listened to his CDs ceaselessly back in the day. He really helped me to understand the power of my thoughts and feelings in creating my reality. He’s one of the spiritual masters.
13. The One Page Business Plan by Jim Horan. I recommend this book to clients new to business. His straightforward and fun approach to business planning is just what you need when you’re getting started. I had the chance to talk with him years ago and he gave me a memorable pep talk about the power of writing my own books…said it was life-changing. He was right.
14. Tribes by Seth Godin. We need each other. We need circles. We need community. We are designed to be connected to others. Sometimes you get to participate, but sometimes, we need you to step up and lead. This book gives you the mojo to step into your power as a leader, organizer and gatherer.
15. The Body is Not an Apology by Sonya Renee Taylor. Whew. This one was hard hitting. Pretty much every woman I know has body image issues of one kind or another. Read it with my book club and we had a conversation recalling when we first heard negative comments about our bodies and for some of us, it started as young as age 3 or 4. The baggage is real, y’all. And Taylor’s approach to radical self-love is a breath of fresh air.
16. Daring Greatly by Brene Brown. When I lived in Houston, I heard her speak in person four times. I’ve never gone to see any teacher so much. She’s a master storyteller and I’ve read almost every book she’s written. I’ve always shared my personal stories freely and was often told I was “too much”. Brown teaches that vulnerability is where we connect deeply with people. That’s the kind of life that I want to live, don’t you? ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐
17. Gift from the Sea by Anne Morrow Lindbergh. “Solitude, says the moon shell. Every person, especially every woman, should be alone sometime during the year, some part of each week and each day.” This treasure of a book written in 1955 will remind you of the importance of slowing down and savoring time to yourself. A classic in self-care literature before “self-care” was even a thing.
18. Attracting Perfect Customer by Stacy Hall & Jan Brogniez (now Stringer) If you are venturing into entrepreneurship, this book is a must read. Their lighthouse story at the beginning is a classic that I share with all my business minded clients. I learned so much about the distinction between attraction vs. promotion that completely shifts how you approach selling and serving. I got to meet Jan at a meditation conference years ago and she’s the real deal.
19. Awakening to the Spirit World by Sandra Ingerman and Hank Wesselman. This book helped me understand that my direct experience of God/Spirit/Universe throughout much of my life was not “weird” but was, in fact, how millions of people around the world experience the Divine. It helped me embrace my spiritual gifts and step fully into my role as a shamanic practitioner.
20. Atomic Habits by James Clear. One of the best books ever written about developing good habits (and breaking bad ones). Clear, compelling, and concise. One to pick up and reread again and again. ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐
21. Bird by Bird by Anne Lamott. “Just write a shitty first draft” is the biggest gem from this book. Lamott’s trademark hilarious humor shines through in this writer’s bible for anyone who puts words on the page.
22. Untamed by Glennon Doyle. Fierce, funny, empowering. This book is one to be read again and again. From the jacket cover “She quit being good so she could be free. She quit pleasing and started living.” YES! Sign me up!
Last by not least, MY books. Why do they make the list? Because writing them made ME a better mom, partner, coach, healer, and writer. And they’ve helped all the people who’ve read them (read the Amazon reviews!)
23. Smart Self Care for Busy Women: 20 Lessons for the “Me Time” You Keep Putting Off by Elizabeth Barbour. I believe that we teach what we most need to learn ourselves. Released on Kindle during the beginning of the pandemic in 2020, I could not have predicted the ripple effect of this tiny book and how it would positively impact women during such a challenging time in our world.
Click here to download Smart Self Care on Kindle
24. Sacred Celebrations: Designing Rituals to Navigate Life’s Milestone Transitions by Elizabeth Barbour. This award-winning book published in 2023 was my heart’s work for seven years. Rituals have saved me time and time again. They have helped me process the deepest pains and celebrate the greatest joys. The clients and friends who participated share great stories which can inspire you to add more magic and meaning into your life through the power of ritual. ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐
Click here to buy Sacred Celebrations on Amazon
Click here to buy a signed copy + some jewelry at Sacred Celebrations
I hope you found some ideas to add to your own TBR list.
I’d love for you to comment and
1. Tell me which of these books you also loved.
2. Share your recommendations with me of your favorite books.
I’m always looking to add to my library and I love hearing from you!
Happy Reading!