This past weekend marked one year since Hurricane Helene ripped through my beloved mountain home of Asheville, North Carolina. The storm left scars on our landscape and in our hearts. Lives were lost, homes swept away, businesses shuttered, and families displaced. Recovery will likely take a decade or more.
Even now, the memories are tender. I texted friends this weekend, remembering raging waters, long lines for gas, neighbors cooking together, supply runs, showering at military stations, and filling 5-gallon buckets of water just to flush toilets. The fear and anxiety were as real as it gets. And so was the awe at the nonstop help we received from across the country—clothes, supplies, money, hands-on support for search and rescue, and ultimately to rebuild.
You may not live in Asheville—or maybe you’ve faced another disaster, whether a hurricane, wildfire, volcano, or earthquake. Yet we all know loss. We all know disruption. Milestone anniversaries have a way of reopening tender places while also reminding us how far we’ve come.
As I reflect on the past year, here are seven lessons that can support anyone navigating life’s storms:
1. Trust Your Intuition
When chaos erupts, the mind wants certainty—but the body often knows the truth before we can articulate it. Listen for the whispers. They’re usually right.
2. Invest in Your Community
One of the most powerful lessons of Helene: we cannot do life alone. From food banks to book clubs, from vigils to volunteer crews, community is the strongest safety net we have.
3. Help Others Less Fortunate Than You
Even when my own home suffered major water damage, I still had a roof over my head. I found purpose in raising funds and delivering supplies to those in need. Helping others reminds us that we are not powerless—we are part of something bigger.
4. It’s OK to Be Uncomfortable
Anniversaries, like disasters, bring up big feelings: sadness, anger, gratitude, hope. Discomfort is part of being human. Allow yourself to feel what’s true in the moment.
5. Resilience is a Gift of Hard Times
Resilience doesn’t mean pretending everything is fine. It means discovering we are stronger and more resourceful than we imagined.
6. Perspective Helps
When I catch myself spiraling, I remind myself: I am safe. I have a house, food, and people who love me. Perspective doesn’t erase pain, but it reminds us we’re not alone.
7. Life Goes On
One of the hardest truths is also one of the most comforting: life goes on. People rebuild. Businesses return. Children continue to learn and play. Both grief and joy can coexist.
Asheville is healing. Families are rebuilding. Nature is regenerating. And those of us who lived through Helene are changed forever.
But this story isn’t just about Western North Carolina. It’s about what it means to live through something hard and come out the other side a little different, a little tougher, and perhaps a little more tender, too.
So, I invite you: as you think about your own anniversaries—the solemn ones, the heavy ones, the milestones you’d rather not mark—pause and honor them. Feel your feelings. Reach out for connection. Notice what you’ve learned. And remind yourself: you are more resilient than you know.
Because life does go on. And so do we.
I’d love to hear from you—what anniversaries have you faced that reshaped your perspective? How do you honor them? Leave a comment and share your story. I’d be honored to witness you.
P.S. Gentle reminder: if you’re looking for meaningful ways to honor life’s anniversaries—both joyful and painful—my book Sacred Celebrations is filled with rituals and practices to help you mark milestone moments with intention, healing, and love.
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